Reasonable Doubt
by Ta1u1a
Summary: A continuation of the season 5 episode Burden of Proof that picks up right where the episode left off. This might be a one-shot. Right now I don't have a theory on who the real killer is, but I had to get this out of my head.


Author's Note: This is a continuation of the season 5 episode Burden of Proof. I don't know if this will be a one-shot or if I'll continue it. I honestly don't have a theory on who the real killer might be, but I had to get this out of my head. So here it is.

* * *

"Jane! Jane!"

Maura yelled for her friend, but when she didn't see Jane or Westcourt surface she pulled out her cell phone and dialed 911.

"Oh god, oh god," she said quietly as she watched the water and waited. The operator gave the standard greeting, asking what her emergency was. "I'm on the Narrows Bridge near Moon Island, and two people have fallen into the water. A man and a woman. Please send help immediately."

Maura had no idea what the current was like. She didn't know where to focus her gaze in the hopes that she would see either one of them surface. It was dark, even with the lights from the bridge and surrounding docks. She felt so helpless and feared she would never see Jane alive again.

In the water, Jane struggled in the dark, and when she finally broke the surface, she could see the bridge was much farther away than she expected. The current had led her out further toward the center of Quincy Bay. She frantically looked around for Westcourt, wondering if she made a huge mistake when she jumped. She was a good swimmer, but she was no lifeguard. It was difficult enough for her to stay afloat on her own in the choppy water. If she found Westcourt, would she be able to swim with him to safety?

As she tried to swim closer to shore, she couldn't believe what she saw in the dark. She was certain she was seeing Westcourt, jammed up against a rock out-cropping. She pushed herself into a breast stroke, swimming with all the speed she could muster. When she reached him, she saw he was face down in the water. She freed him from the out-cropping and turned him so he was face up, floating nearly on top of her. She wasted no time finding her bearings and swimming to the shore of Moon Island. She could hear the pops of gunfire at the BPD shooting range as she came nearer. Finally, the water was shallow enough that she felt bottom and she began dragging Westcourt's limp and water-logged body onto shore. She was already exhausted, and when she realized he wasn't breathing, she wasn't sure she was going to be able to help him, leaving her efforts wasted.

She checked her cell phone, but knew it wouldn't work after being in the water. She had no time to wait for whatever rescue Maura was calling for. She took a breath and began CPR on Westcourt, doing her best to focus only on saving him and not on the guilt she was feeling for driving him to that bridge in the first place. Ultimately, she knew the evidence had almost cleanly pointed to him. Any other detective probably wouldn't have even noticed the oddity with the toilet handle and the fingerprint it yielded. Maybe Frankie would have, but the two of them were the only detectives she knew with more than a passing knowledge of plumbing.

She continued the chest compressions and she thought she heard the sound of a helicopter in the distance. 'That was fast,' she thought, but quickly returned her focus to the task at hand. The seconds ticked by and she was beginning to lose hope. It felt like an eternity had passed when finally she heard a gurgle from Westcourt's throat and he began coughing up water. She turned him on his side to lessen his effort and she breathed her own sigh of relief. She knew he wasn't out of the woods, but at least he had made it this far. She hoped he would live to see her prove his innocence and bring the real killer to justice.

* * *

Jane leaned against the trunk of a squad car with a blanket wrapped around her shoulders as she watched the paramedics move Westcourt onto a gurney. She had removed her soaked suit jacket, and the breeze and her wet clothing made an otherwise pleasant night fairly chilly. As the paramedics moved toward the ambulance, two unmarked police cars pulled up – her own and Korsak's. Frankie and Maura stepped out of her car and Korsak soon joined them. Frankie and Korsak immediately headed her way, but Maura stopped to talk to the paramedics. Jane assumed she was checking on Westcourt's chances of survival.

"You're insane. You know that, right?" Frankie asked as he immediately hugged her.

"Yeah, I think I'm starting to realize that," she said dryly. They separated and she offered him a smirk. "At least I can cross 'jumping off a bridge' off my bucket list."

"Are you okay?" Korsak asked, ignoring her joke.

"Paramedics checked me out. I'm fine," she replied. "Not sure I can say the same for Westcourt. Might have been for nothing."

She looked past Frankie and Korsak to see Maura headed their way. Behind her the ambulance siren blared to life as they took Westcourt to the nearest hospital. Jane noticed Maura did not look happy. Her expression was hard to read. It was either concern or anger. Jane wasn't sure. She would soon find out.

"Hey Maura, did they say if Westcourt was going to...ow!"

She exclaimed in pain as Maura back-handed her on the left bicep. It wasn't just a reactionary "ow" either. The hit genuinely hurt.

"What is wrong with you? You could have been killed! What you did was reckless and stupid," Maura yelled at her. It had been a long time since Jane had seen her that angry. "What were you thinking?"

"I was thinking Westcourt would die if I didn't go after him," Jane answered, ending the statement with the lilt of a question and hoping the response would be what Maura wanted to hear.

"He still might," Maura said with a growl, answering the question Jane had begun to ask before her angry assault. "You're lucky to be alive."

"What choice did I have?" Jane asked defensively, unsure how to process Maura's anger. It wasn't quite what she had expected.

"Sergeant Korsak, would you mind giving me a ride back to the station?" Maura asked, ignoring Jane's question. Korsak shot an uncertain glance at Jane but nodded his head.

"Sure, doc. No problem," he said. Maura turned and headed for Korsak's car.

"Maura! Wait!" Jane said. She took a couple steps forward but didn't follow any further as she watched Korsak and Maura leave. She turned back to Frankie. "What the hell? How did I become the bad guy?"

"You scared the crap out of her. What do you expect?" Frankie responded as they walked toward Jane's car. "She didn't say a word on the drive down from the bridge. She's pissed. And she's right. You're lucky to be alive."

"And I repeat...what choice did I have?"

"You had a choice. Most cops wouldn't have done what you did," he responded. He moved to the driver's side and sat behind the wheel before Jane had a chance to protest. "I wouldn't have."

"That's because you can't swim," Jane said with a chuckle as she reluctantly sat on the passenger side.

"I can swim!"

"Yeah, dog paddle," she joked. Frankie just shook his head at her. "Maura hasn't been that mad at me since I shot Paddy Doyle."

"I think she'll get over this a lot faster, thankfully," Frankie said, remembering what a pain it was to deal with Maura and Jane when they were on the outs.

"I hope you're right," Jane said.

Frankie turned onto the road heading inland away from Moon Island, and they spent the rest of the car ride in silence. Jane's mind was preoccupied with two problems – finding out who set up Paul Westcourt for murder and making things right with Maura. She wasn't sure which would be more difficult.

* * *

The next morning Jane's first stop at the station led her down in the elevator rather than up. When she reached Maura's office, she saw she was already there. She was reviewing a report with Susie waiting nearby.

"Hey, Maura," Jane said as she entered carrying two coffees. "Are you still mad at me? I got you a coffee."

She smiled as she held out the coffee, hoping to win Maura over with minor bribery. Maura glanced up from the report briefly before flipping a page and continuing to read. Susie felt the tension between them and shot nervous glances between the two women.

"Silent treatment? Really?" Jane asked, her smile fading. She was amazed at how upset her friend was. There hadn't been much time to consider the consequences before she jumped off the bridge, but even if there had been, she doubted this would have been a consequence that would have come to mind.

Maura signed off on the report and handed it to Susie, who practically ran as she headed out of the office and shut the door behind her. Maura looked at Jane who finally became tired of holding the coffee out and set it down on Maura's desk.

"Are you really that mad at me for jumping?" she asked.

"Did you want to die?" Maura asked suddenly.

At first Jane thought that was another rhetorical, angry question, but she saw in Maura's face that she was being serious. She wanted an answer, which left Jane shocked.

"What? No. Why would you think that?"

"It hasn't been a very good year, Jane," Maura explained herself. "Casey left. We lost Frost. You lost the baby."

"Yeah, thanks for the recap," Jane said, bitterness in her tone as she set down her own coffee and slumped down in one of Maura's chairs.

"I just thought losing Westcourt would be the final straw," Maura said. She walked around her desk and sat in the other chair next to Jane. "You had just proven his innocence and then..."

"I jumped to save a man's life, not to end my own," Jane said, looking Maura firmly in the eyes to prove how serious she was. "I promise you I am _not_ suicidal. I still don't understand why you would think that."

Maura sighed and looked at her hands, worried that she would make Jane angry by broaching the subject she was getting ready to talk about.

"I'm worried about you. You bottle things up," she explained. "Sometimes that's okay, but with everything that's happened, the bottle can only hold so much."

"It's a big bottle," Jane joked as she leaned forward, elbows on her knees. "I mean, you're right. This year has kind of sucked...a lot, but I'm dealing with it. It's hard, especially without Frost, but I'm dealing."

"What about the baby?" Maura asked. She knew Jane was sad about losing the baby, but it seemed like there should be a stronger emotion than just sad for that kind of loss.

"I...I don't know," Jane said. "I'm mostly sad about it, but..."

Jane trailed off. She hadn't talked about her miscarriage much because she was afraid of what people would think about the things she was feeling.

"But what?" Maura prodded.

"It's stupid," Jane said, shaking her head. "I feel like how I feel isn't right, like there's a certain way to feel about a miscarriage and I'm not feeling it."

"There's no wrong or right way to feel," Maura said. "Feelings are individual."

"I just...part of me is relieved that I miscarried," Jane said, finally. She looked at Maura awaiting judgment. "That doesn't seem right."

"Why are you relieved?" Maura asked, making sure the judgment Jane was expecting never came.

"Because of what I do," Jane replied. "I mean, you know me. I put everything I have into my job."

"That's why you're so good at it," Maura said with a nod of her head.

"If I was still pregnant, I wouldn't have jumped off that bridge. I would have held back," she explained. "And then Paul Westcourt would be dead. It wouldn't stop there. My work would suffer."

"That's a legitimate and logical concern," Maura said. "One you had before you lost the baby."

"I feel like if I tell anyone else that, they'll think I'm crazy for putting my job before the baby," Jane continued. "My mom would think I'm certifiable."

"I think she already does," Maura said with a chuckle.

"You didn't tell her about last night, did you?" Jane asked, worried about the onslaught she would face the next time she saw her mother.

"No, she was asleep when I got home," Maura explained. Then she turned back to Jane's concerns about motherhood and being a detective. "I don't think you're crazy, Jane. You take pride in everything you do. If you can't put 100% into your job and 100% into being a mom, you'll feel like a failure."

Jane was glad that Maura understood. She had a feeling that if anybody would, it would be Maura. That's why she had picked her to take care of the baby had anything happened to Jane after the baby was born. She could count on Maura to know what Jane would want for her child. She loved Casey and wished things could have worked for them, but Maura probably knew Jane better than anyone else in the world.

After a long moment of silence, Maura spoke up again, asking a question Jane wasn't sure how to answer.

"Do you think you'll ever have children?" she asked. Jane stared at the floor.

"I don't know," she replied. She fidgeted with her watch as she contemplated the answer. "I don't think I could be a single mom. I don't think I could do it alone and still be a cop."

"You wouldn't be alone," Maura responded, referring to the support Jane would receive from her, Angela, and her brothers.

"Well, yeah, I know that, but I just think..." she said, trailing off. "Ultimately, the responsibility is mine. I want to make sure my kid's taken care of."

"And she will be," Maura said. "Or he will be. When the time comes, I think you'll be ready."

"Are you sure? I wouldn't be too reckless to be a mother, would I?" Jane asked, her tone saying exactly what it needed to say to Maura.

"I'm sorry I yelled at you," Maura said with a sheepish smile.

"You called me stupid."

"Well, technically, I called the act of jumping off a bridge stupid," Maura countered.

"You're really going to argue semantics?" Jane asked. "And you hit me."

"A light slap on the arm," Maura said, trying to defend herself.

"Light? You left a mark!" Jane said as she shrugged her blazer off her left shoulder to reveal the red mark on her arm. "See?"

Maura leaned forward and examined the mark, surprised at her handiwork.

"That's pretty good. That went through that blanket and everything," Maura said. Jane scowled at her.

"It hurt. Were you wearing, like, brass knuckles or something?"

"Yes, I carry them with me everywhere," Maura said with a smirk as she stood. She picked up both coffees and handed Jane's to her. "After all, I need to protect myself. I'm best friends with a homicide detective, chief medical examiner, and my biological father is the head of the Irish mob. It's a miracle I'm not dead already."

The comment was intended as a joke and the two of them smiled briefly as they started to head out of her office. However, the truth behind the statement hit them both at almost the same time, they stopped walking, and they looked at each other.

"Why the hell do we do what we do?" Jane asked, for the first time in a long time expressing even the slightest doubt about her career choice. Maura contemplated the question for a moment.

"Because the dead need a voice," she said. She thought about the current case they were working on. "Danielle needs a voice...to speak for justice."

Jane nodded her head and they resumed walking to the elevator. She certainly intended to get that justice, for Danielle and Paul Westcourt.


End file.
